The road I've travelled has at least led me to where I am now

On the long drive home, after our summer trip, just 3 hours from Thompson; I felt sad. I had remembered so many wasted years. So much had gone wrong. A lot of bad decisions. Decisions that I had made or were forced to make for one reason or another. So many regrets. How I wished I could do it over again. I had almost cried. Thinking of what a waste my life had been. Perhaps I was depressed because, originally, we were planning on moving…Now we were on our way home. Maybe I was just tired of being on the road. Not sure. I had looked over at my husband. My husband of 2 years and I started to understand that if my life hadn’t rolled out exactly the way it had I wouldn’t have met him. I wouldn’t be married to him. Right at that moment I felt grateful for my past. It wasn’t always that bad. Often I was in the right place at the right time and things had just worked out perfectly. Sometimes I felt I was pretty lucky.

Thank God everything worked out the way it did. Hopefully I will have more luck coming my way. My son, Will thinks Mike is our lucky charm. I think he’s my angel that dropped from heaven and landed right in front of me. I will never give back.

September 4th and 5th I went back to work at the museum. It’s been 2 months since I’ve worked there. It went well though. The following Wednesday, September 8th I went back to work at the school. I’ve had such a great summer. I didn’t want it to end. It’s been such a busy summer, as always. I hadn’t even achieved half of the work I had wished to accomplish. I think I plan and hope for way too much. Now I have so much to do between now and next summer. I won’t get it all done. I might as well face the facts and accept the truth. I bet the next 9 months or so will just fly by. Is that a good thing or bad? Someday I may want time to slow down. Someday. My disability is progressive. The only way I can slow it down is by working harder. Giving more. Learning more. Speeding up. I have to keep my brain active as well. So, to slow down some things I have to speed other things up.

Slippers that I had bought from my friend Tracy.

We drove by her in Dauphin...go figure!

Riding Mountain

Bike built for 4 in Riding Mountain

Home, safe and maybe not quite so sound

We got home Thursday night. We had lunch in The Pas with my old, long ago, (30 years ago) friend, Tracy Schell. It was good to see her again. I bought a pair of moccasins from her. She makes such wonderful things. I'll have to post some of her picures of the things she has made. Soon...

The drive home was a long one. I don't know if I'm crazier for going the long way home or coming home at all...
It doesn't feel like home anymore. So foreign. So alien. So temporary. Hopefully.

We went to Selkirk Sunday last. What a beautiful little town. I think Selkirk has turned into our second choice. Portage La Prairie is just like Thompson...Brandon was interesting. We didn't make it to Neepawa. We did go to Riding Mountain though. That was so peaceful and tranquil. So many people walking, holding hands, riding bikes (there were a lot of bikes build for 4,) people walking with their children, people walking their dogs, people relaxing on the beach, on the bridge, on the water, boating. The only dramma to be seen or heard was perhaps a dog barking at another dog. During our drive out we saw a family riding a horse drawn carriage. ...In no way did Dauphin compare. We have friends who are planning on moving to Dauphin. We, however, didn't share the same desire...too far away from Winnipeg and North Western Ontario.

Mike has to go back to work next week. I have another month off...as long as they don't rope me into working at the museum...I've started another wild and crazy project that'll help us with all of our plans...I'll tell you about it as soon as it's finalized.

Depending on the weather, we're going fishing tomorrow. It's been raining today but we really need the rain.

So many forks in the road...

I wish I had had time to write in the last couple of months. It would be evident to anyone who might read this that I am truly certifiable...keep reading and I think you'll agree.

I've been getting way over my head with future plans and my new big dream. Like always, I want so much and I want it right now...I keep thinking, 'I should slow down, learn more, plan better, investigate, research, do some marketing and...breathe.'

A few months ago we were planning to move to Ontario. We were all excited and afraid. We were hoping to buy a book store..."crazy right?" We'd like a book store as a family business. A book store is my big dream. I've been wanting to do this for years. "Is this the worst idea anyone ever came up with? Especially right now?"

Years ago I was wondering, 'What would be a good job for all of us (the boys and I?) I had been a single mom for many years. Will, Scott and I are physically disabled. Certain jobs aren't even an option for us. Will (21) doesn't drive. I don't think he'll ever be able to. Scott (17) doesn't drive either. Hopefully he will someday. I had thought a book store would be a great business for all of us. We could publish our own books. We could enjoy being surrounded by books. Physically we could all run a book store. It seemed like a good idea at the time...

I'm not taking a business class, maybe I should. If I have time, I'll take a class this fall. I have two manuals on how to open and run a book store. I'm reading them now. Hopefully the books will be a big help.

What if now is not a good time to have a book store? What if someday people stop buying real books? What if ebooks and the internet is all anyone ever wants/needs? I hope books don't became extinct! That would be so sad...Kindles, Sony Readers, Ipads and such sound cool and I like using the internet for a lot of things but...no real books at all? I wouldn't want that.

It's summer now. I'm in Ontario. We haven't moved yet...we decided to wait another year. Where we want to move (in the North-West part of Ontario) is not doing so well, economically. It looks promising that things will get better. We just have to wait awhile. We're also debating on what or where to go if our ideal spot doesn't pan out. We've been researching and visiting other places that might be a suitable home and a great place to have a book store. Perhaps Selkirk. Maybe Portage La Prairie. Brandon (I think they're opening a Cole's book store soon.) Neepawa. Dauphin. We'll see what we can do...

Almost 4 years ago

Almost 4 years ago, just weeks before my website was online, my computer crashed. I just took my second course in Microsoft Front Page, while I was on holidays for the summer. I was planning on, finally, putting my site online. After so much work and mistakes I made, which forced me to redo so much work and typing. (I often learn things the hard way.I'll get there eventually, I hope!) During those few weeks without my computer my plans were put on hold. One night I couldn't sleep. The idea of a novel ran through my head until 4 in the morning. I never wrote a novel before. I spent more time in my early 20s writing children's stories and articles but not novels. I hadn't even planned on writing a novel but the idea kept running through my head, and it ran like a movie. 'How fortunate for me,' You might think, but I'm sure writing a novel is going to be much more work than I can even imagine. It's a paranormal story...I don't read those kinds of novels nor do I watch those kinds of movies. So, why was this film projecting in front of my eyes...or in my brain, I just don't know! My older son, Will, writes paranormal comics. I decided that I would need Will's help if I chose to write this book. My younger son, Scott, writes romances. He didn't write them back then but he's my very logical son. I thought I would need both of their help. I spoke to them about it the next day and they just loved the idea. Writing a novel together sounded like fun. I was thinking of what quality time we'd have together while writing together. It would be fun, published or not. We decided to write this book. 'Forever Ends.' Will and Scott helped me with the characters and the names' of the characters. That took a very long time and we kept changing our minds...One of the male character's name was changed 4 times, his career as well. I finally picked a log cabin builder for Ryan, the male character. At the time, at the museum, we were planning on offering log cabin building workshops for the people in Northern Manitoba. The instructor wanted to teach people how to build cabins. It sounded exciting and I planned to take part, observe and take notes for my book. It sounded like a good idea at the time. The instructor moved to another province a few months before the workshops began. I'll have to do research another way, I thought. I know a log cabin builder in Wabowden, 1 1/2 hours away from Thompson. Perhaps I'll talk to him. I knew I couldn't write this book without Will and Scott help...and now even Mike's help. Will has this idea of a second book, written by him and a third, written by Scott. I've always thought that that would be so cool to accomplish. However, I slowed down with my writing as well as my website since I got married, a year and half ago. There's still another dream though, an even more important dream. A dream for my family's future. Again, I'll write about that one later. I was planning on waiting until 2011 before writing again because I felt I'd be too busy with this really big dream...Can I do everything at once? The website, extra baking and cooking, the novel, this big dream? I think I'm losing my mind! I've always given myself too many projects all at once. Maybe the website and the novel will help with my big dream...or will it slow everything down and I won't work as hard on my big dream. Maybe I'm trying to self sabotage....maybe I've always done this? I'm going to have to try and balance everything out. I'm not good at balancing things.

The Geocache I'm putting on hold, at least! I thought of a Geocache to advertize my site, but the big dream involves moving out of the province. So I'll wait until after the move before I do the Geocache. At least that's one less crazy idea that I'll fulfilling now.

More on that later...

Peanut Butter Oatmeal Muffins

Peanut Butter Oatmeal Muffins

1 cup rice milk
1 cup oatmeal
1 egg
¼ cup olive oil
¾ cup unbleached flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup peanut butter
1 cup apple sauce

In a small bowl, combine milk and oatmeal, let sit for 15 minutes. In separate bowl, beat together oil and egg. Stir in oatmeal mixture. In large bowl combine flour, baking powder and baking soda. Add wet ingredients and peanut butter and apple sauce. Spoon batter into greased muffin tins, large muffin tins or mini loaf pan. Bake at 375 degrees for 20-25 minutes.

Recipe for Mac & Cheese w/ apples

MACARONI AND CHEESE WITH APPLES

¼ cup butter
¼ cup flour
½ cup milk
2 cups of grated, desired cheese
2 cups macaroni, cooked
1 apple, cored, peeled and cubed
Whisk together flour and milk in a small bowl. In a medium sauce pan melt butter and add flour and milk. Simmer on low for about 15 minutes, continue to whisk. Add cheese and let melt for 5 minutes then add macaroni and pour into an 8 by 8 casserole dish. Stir in apple cubes. Bake at 350 degrees for 20 minutes.   

The recipe for As Soon as Tuna (tuna casserole)

AS SOON AS TUNA
(tuna casserole)

2 cans tuna
2 cans mushroom soup
1 can diced tomatoes
1 can sliced mushrooms
½ a 340g bag of egg noodles, cooked
½ a bag of garlic croutons
1 cup of frozen veggies, suggestion: peas, broccoli, celery, carrots and cauliflower
1 green onion, diced
1 tsp each, cilantro, parsley and garlic powder
1 cup of grated, desired cheese, separated
Mix together all but the cheese into a 12 by 8 casserole dish. Stir in ½ cup cheese. Sprinkle remaining ½ cup cheese on top. Bake at 425 degrees for 20 minutes.

As Soon as Tuna

My son, Scott has geography homework. It’s due very soon, so no doubt I’ll be helping him with it. His assignment is about history of Thompson, the city we live in. I was born here and my second job is at the museum. Oddly enough, Scott needs a lot of information regarding ‘Community Memories’ from the museum’s website http://www.heritagenorthmuseum.ca.) Which I created and had typed up the ‘Community Memories.’ How convenient for Scott! One would think he should get a good mark on it. We’ll see…My plan tonight is helping Scott and then I’m going to make a tuna casserole that I’ve made a few times already. Every time I’ve made it, twice so far, I can’t help but feel, ‘It needs something else.’ I’m adding Diced tomatoes tonight. I hope that works. Its name will be, ‘As Soon as Tuna,’ an idea my older son, Will gave me. Tuna is one of Will’s favourites. Unfortunately, Scott doesn’t like it. He’ll be eating chicken nuggets instead. Occasionally I make things that Scott likes and Will doesn’t. Really! The other day I made macaroni and cheese with apples. It was very good. A recipe a friend gave my husband. I still have to put the recipe on my site and if the tuna casserole works out I’ll add that one as well. Here’s hoping…~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As Soon as Tuna was a success! Will, Mike and I think it’s great! I’ll add the 2 new recipes on the site as soon as possible. I have Friday off so I think I’ll bake my newest idea, ‘Oatmeal Peanut Butter Muffins.’ I’ll write about how they turn out later.

A litle bit about me

http://www.genieinafilebox.com/ is my website. Many years ago, when computers and the internet first came along, I had thought, ‘I should someday type up all my recipes and children’s activities.’ I had been working with children since 1988. I’ve always been such an odd geek; I had started baking when I was 2 and I started writing recipes when I was 12. So, about 10 years ago I started typing my recipes and children’s activities. I thought it would be great to put all my dreams in one basket. I had spent 3 years, typing mostly on my lunch hour. August 11, 2006 I had launched my website. I had spent 15 hours a day for 3 weeks transferring all my files to my new site. I had taken 2 courses to learn how to use Front Page but there was still so much to learn and there’s always so much more to learn. Even though I only have almost 300 files on my site and I still feel there’s a lot of work I need to put into it, the day I put it online was one of the proudest days of my life. Graduating from college. Giving birth to 2 boys. Getting my driver’s license (6 years ago.) Getting married for the first time ever (Sept. 5, 2008.) Those are my proudest moments…my website has been on the back burner for the last year and a half, understandably! Now, however I’d like to put more effort into it again. I was off on holidays during the winter break and I started advertising my site and doing extra work on it. My husband, Mike will be working nights for a while, so I’ll have a bit of time on my hands. I’ll work on my site and my other big dream…that I’ll explain in a future blog. I had been thinking about writing a blog for a while. I watched the movie Julie & Julia last night and that kind of clinched it. How inspiring! I’m always looking for inspiration and I'm always looking to inspire.